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Funny Typos

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“When in the course of writing events, it becomes necessary for each author to resolve ambiguities over typos. Always assume among the powers of the publishing world, the separate and equal insistence, that manuscript errors are inherently egregious.

“We hold these typos to be self-evident, even though all typos are created equal, that they are unintentionally emboldened by their authors with certain ‘mistakable’ rights that among these are errors, gaffes and the pursuit of embarrassment.”

For beginning writers, or any level writer for that matter, please don’t anguish over making typos. Don’t beat yourself up over them. Understand that typos come with the territory. Instead of feeling disgusted and embarrassed, enjoy them. They can be very entertaining … and they’re easy enough to fix. After all, they’re going to happen no matter what.  Editing is usually the procedure where they die a timely death.

Many a typo has been accidentally composed by the best of writers, but they never see the light of the publishing world. Beginning authors never get to say, “See, those writers are seasoned authors … and they make the same mistakes I do! It’s kind of like being a weekend golfer and watching the pros on TV … and how we revel in the mistakes they make! It brings them down to our level of inconsistent expertise.

In December of 2016, I reached a milestone in writing. I penned my 3,000,000th word. Here are some eye-rolling, some embarrassing, some funny typos I made SINCE THEN while writing my Albacron sci-fi series. I hope you enjoy them as much as I have.

  1. I am a bored member of this organization.
  2. I turned to see the aircraft go up in a ball of fame.
  3. We crapt back on our hands and knees.
  4. The crowd erupted in shoting.
  5. I truly livered moment to moment.
  6. I will resign my position once my germ is up next year.
  7. Vega and Raya entered and stared at me, their moths dropping open.
  8. Electra turned to see Vega writing on the floor. (writhing)
  9. The charge is to pour society. (change – our)
  10. I trolled over and staggered to my feet.
  11. Which was do we go?
  12. Rabidovich picked up his form and jabbed some of the white meat with it.
  13. Had our Grand Elite Corps not sized her family …
  14. I looked at the doors and determined that they swung wither way.
  15. He stared at it and shirted his gaze to mine.
  16. Medicine Bow Peak is prominent, and the terrain would make it hard to get two.
  17. I was trying to get the police offers out of their cars.
  18. I grasped her hand in mint (mine).
  19. How can you even say that without creaking a smile?
  20. When the headset is plugged into the jack and it turns, the connection is lost. Giggling re-establishes contact.
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Eugene Orlando is a board member, group leader, regional director, and lifetime member of the FWA. He is also an author of works of fiction and books on writing. Early in 2015, he became an editor for FWA’s “Editors Helping Writers” program and is a member of the Editorial Freelancers Association.

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5 Responses

  1. Lauren
    | Reply

    From the blog post: “Many a typo has been accidentally composed by the best of writers, but they never see the light of the publishing world. ”

    Never? Sorry, this just isn’t true.There are typos in even most famous, most respected books. Human beings edit books and human beings make mistakes. Sometimes new errors are introduced during production stages. If an editor ever promises that they will be able to make your book error-free, run in the other direction, because they are not an experienced, trained professional. Editors are not super human. While they can certainly help you improve your writing and greatly reduce the number of typos and other errors, no one can guarantee perfection!

    P.S. What/who is being quoted in the first two paragraphs of the blog post? Why was the source left out?

  2. Eugene Orlando
    | Reply

    The quotes indicate a rewrite of the opening of the Declaration of Independence to apply to typos in writing. As an editor, I understand that typos do see the light of day, but none to the degree of egregiousness that I have illustrated here. At least, I have never seen any in print so egregious and entertaining. Here are two more I’ve discovered since I turned in this article:

    21. You’re just too funny for worlds.
    22. Gemma lifted her can and shoved it back into the sand. (cane)

  3. Elle Andrews Patt
    | Reply

    lolol.You’ve inspired me to save a few of mine for later sharing :-))

  4. Lynn
    | Reply

    I love this post! My own cringe typo: “He admitted to receiving a penchant from the government.”

    There’s this gem in ‘Twilight’: “I ate breakfast cheerily, watching the dust moats stirring in the sunlight”. 12 years later there are still at least three Tumblr posts a day ripping Meyer and her editor to shreds over it. So Lauren’s right; sometimes these embarrassing errors do make it to print–and they stay there. But as print turns digital, we’ll probably see mistakes like this less and less as people correct or delete them the instant they’re discovered. That’s too bad because, to paraphrase Pope, mistakes humanize us. And, in our increasingly technical world, we need as many reminders as we can get that there’s a thinking, feeling person on the other side of the screen.

    Ever since I started putting myself out there with my writing, I’ve realized how hard it is not just to spell out my thoughts but also spell those thoughts correctly. It’s a lot of pressure–but I feel less pressure when I let up on myself and by extension become less critical of others.

    There are so many ways to produce things that contain mistakes, but only one way to produce perfection. That’s why pedants never get anything done.

  5. Ellen Holder
    | Reply

    In the 1950’s, our weekly hometown newspaper was notorious for publishing typos. One week they did a story about the town requiring that abandoned outhouses be removed from all residences within the city limits. This was printed on the front page, with a photograph of one of the offending outhouses. The caption beneath the photo read “One of several shots taken around town.”— Except, in the word “shots”, someone hit the “i” instead of the “o”.

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